Twelve days of Christmas

People sometimes come to this blog with wonderfully weird search terms. Here are twelve of the quirkiest (with links to what I think is the relevant post):

1. are doctor who‘s slippers predestined – you who Googled this – well, Yahoo!ed this, I love you.
2. predestination innuendo – if you know a good one, please share it in the comments!
3. it is ok we can sing ebenezer song at the churches – that one is not quite as surprising, but the wording brings a smug smile to my lips
4. dont use comic sans – missing apostrophe aside, I couldn’t agree more
5. phil drysdale church – see, Phil, you should start one and name it after you! (if you need to know, Phil is working with Bethel!)
6. why people like tea – well, why wouldn’t they? Seriously, if you need to search for this, you’re either a PhD student with too much time on your hands, meaning you look for causes to natural fundamentals; or you just haven’t lived.
7. why people don’t like making tea – don’t they, really?
8. best way to cut grass that is too tall – this one can be understood; but sadly, my blog on 3-foot grass will not answer that question. Considering this is not the only search query to that effect, here it is: strimmer, shears – both will take a while, and the latter will slightly hurt your back – or, if you’re feeling manly and have that at hand, a scythe.
9. slipper in the bible – now for this one and the next two, yes, I get how searching for “slipper” might lead to this blog. But seriously, are there studies about slippers in the Bible? There may be something in that, actually…
10. slipper worship – if you’re doing that, you’re doing it wrong. But I’m flattered all the same.
11. discipline slipper – ah, we are getting to the true use of the slipper: it is NOT to warm your feet, but to discipline those who bring up predestination.
12. piano sex – just, what? Why anyone would Google that is beyond me. Why it then led to my blog is a further mystery!

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Twelve weird search terms, eleven Twitter accounts, ten worship songs, nine Christian memes, eight books to read, seven useful websites, six popular posts, five blends of tea!

Four posts by others, three Christian jokes, two awesome apps, and a fun fact about the Bible

First off, if you’re on Twitter, I hope you’re following me :-p But this post is not about me, it’s about the wealth of amazing Tweeters out there:

1. The Church Mouse – if you’re interested in church news, that’s THE account to follow.
2. Ben Reed – ’nuff said.
3. Larry Norman – he loves Puritans, and he always posts thoughtful stuff (although sometimes in German, and not altogether too often!)
4. Dean Aaron Roberts – a young pastor, he will post a fair amount of cool stuff
5. Dave Bish – works with UCCF
6. C.S. Lewis quotes – who doesn’t like CS Lewis?
7. Ruth Gledhill – religion correspondent with The Times
8. Phil Drysdale – will post thought-provoking stuff
9. Jonathan Pearson – great pastor-blogger
10. WelbyBot – for laughs about the new Archbishop
11. Liberal Vicar – I am often tempted to retweet him, but people might think I agree when it’s very fine sarcasm!

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Eleven Twitter accounts, ten worship songs, nine Christian memes, eight books to read, seven useful websites, six popular posts, five blends of tea!

Four posts by others, three Christian jokes, two awesome apps, and a fun fact about the Bible

I’ll admit to it straight away – I like hymns a lot more than modern worship songs. That said, there are some modern songs which are cool. Without further ado, here’s 10 of my favourites:

1. Pete James – Take me in closer. I don’t think I know any modern worship song which captures emotion, desire to worship and response quite as well as this one.
2. Oh the deep, deep love of Jesus – the Selah version is quite cool. I love this hymn because the music sticks to the words nicely and is, again, about how we relate to God.
3. Be thou my vision – the 4Him version is amazing. Simply put, this song is an amazing prayer to sing, and is a good reminder of where to set our sights.
4. In Christ Alone – a brilliant summary of the Gospels, which still includes us and our rejection.
5. You won’t relent – Jesus Culture (click the album Your Love Never Fails). I don’t know what it is with this song, but it gives me chills whenever I listen to it. Very strong words; not quite about response as much as total abandonment, but still very nice.
6. Before the throne – The Modern Post have a modern version of it which is very cool. And it captures the importance of Trinity rather than thinking about a watered-down single, generic God we might be worshipping.
7. Amazing Grace – it’s been damaged a fair bit by modern additions (especially the “when we’ve been here ten thousand years” verse, which adds grammatical mistakes!), but the original is great. And the story around its composition is, too.
8. Grace alone – still The Modern Post. On this blog, there was bound to be a song about predestination!
9. Come thou fount of every blessing – Gateway Worship’s version is quite cool, although it’s cutting off a verse and adding a chorus! Again, the reason I like this one is that it comes from a clear desire to change, and the admission of a dependence on God to change.
10. This link is particularly for my friends in the chaplaincy – not my favourite at all, but needed to be here. But to make up for it, I’ll list Relient K’s I don’t need a soul – technically not a worship song, but still very good!

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Ten worship songs, nine Christian memes, eight books to read, seven useful websites, six popular posts, five blends of tea!

Four posts by others, three Christian jokes, two awesome apps, and a fun fact about the Bible

1. Lazy senior student
2. Philosoraptor
3. No words can describe this one. If you get it, you will be my friend forever.
4. Overly attached girlfriend
5. Demotivational poster (with Biblical reference linked here)
6. Downfall video
7. First world problem
8. Futurama Not sure if
9. General Synod

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Nine Christian memes, eight books to read, seven useful websites, six popular posts, five blends of tea!

Four posts by others, three Christian jokes, two awesome apps, and a fun fact about the Bible

Books on calling

1. Francis Dewar, Called or collared – yes, this is a book on vocations, and vocations to ministry specifically. But every Christian would benefit from reading it – it is amazing.
2. Michael Ramsay, The Christian Priest today – a classic, re-edited many a time. Focuses a fair bit on the role of the priest as intercessor/representative.

General Christian books

3. C.S. Lewis, The Screwtape Letters – imaginary letters  from a senior demon to his subordinate, who is in charge of tempting someone. Brilliant read!
4. Rowan Williams,  Silence and Honey Cakes – just get it. I will organise a competition at some point with it as its prize; it is just THAT good. Wisdom from the desert fathers (ie 4th-6th Century Egyptian monks).
5. Joyce Huggett, Listening to God – a great book on contemplative prayer (I have an old edition which does not have the subtitle… hopefully it’s the same!)
6. Henri Nouwen, The Return of the  Prodigal Son – very moving. Am currently reading it, so should reserve judgment, but… it is really good.

Other cool books

7. Orson Scott Card, Ender’s Game – which is about to be released as a film. A page-turner, really. A must-read if you like sci-fi.
8. J.R.R. Tolkien, Roverandom – a non-Middle Earth Tolkien book, which is always welcome in the middle of Hobbit-mania!

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Eight books to read, seven useful websites, six popular posts, five blends of tea!

Four posts by others, three Christian jokes, two awesome apps, and a fun fact about the Bible